The Most Blunderful Time of the Year

Every year we as Cubs fans, no, baseball fans are subjected to so much vomit that you have to wonder how much the GMs drank at winter meeting.

Cub Nation is vomiting so much speculation right now that it would make a frat boy proud. Miguel Tejada is the fancy of every Cub fan right now. Now having said that, every Cub fan wants to give up anything to have him. Tejada is a reliable player and a MVP caliber player, but I don't think his crap can be used like currency. He is worth a great deal but he isn't worth what many propose he is.

I have read that topflight talent like Prior and Zambrano are fair game when it comes to acquiring Tejada. If this is not crazy then I don't know what crazy is. Zambrano is the Cubs ace and Mark Prior can be even better than Big Z and that is scary. Tejada is a great player but Ronny Cedeno is no slouch and can easily fill the gaping hole of SS or 2B while the Cubs go out and acquire more reasonably priced talent to fill in the position not filled by Cedeno.

I think the Cubs should go after the player they were going after before all this hoopla erupted, Julio Lugo. Guess what Miguel Tejada had 89 runs last year but guess who else did... Julio Lugo. Moreover, Lugo did it in 38 less at bats and with a higher on base percentage. Lugo also had fewer strike outs than the new baseball Jesus and had more walks than him as well. You might now be asking yourself, "but batting is only a small part of the game compared to defense so how do they match up there?" Well intrepid readers I have the answer they are both equal. That's right equal. In fact Lugo is slightly better when it comes to putouts/chances (Tejada 753/252, Lugo 759/311) and range factor/zone rating (Tejada 4.72/.818, Lugo 4.94/.841).

If I were the Cubs I would pay no mind to the crazy Cub fans of America (hey, we are crazy. Losing for 97 years will do that) and listen to reason. There is no need to overpay for Tejada when you can have Lugo for so much less and get just as much out of him.

Well Fuck Me Running...

The Bears are in 1st place. (Insert gloating, because my predictions of dominant defense came true!) This iteration of the Bears could have a real chance at winning a Super Bowl if only they had a... I don't know... the Bears never have a good one... they throw oblong orbs downfield with accuracy and velocity. Oh, I got it a QUARTERBACK! The one position that consistently bites the Bears in the ass is back to potentially spoil the party.

Kyle Orton has done far more than is expected of him during his tenure as the QB. Then again, Orton has also done far less than is expected of him. What I mean by this is Orton is good at managing the game and not throwing the ball to the other team, but Orton also takes almost no pass attempts and doesn't really produce any yards except for once in a blue moon. Orton shows flashes of brilliance every now and again reminiscent of the Heisman candidate at Purdue. On the other hand, Orton shows flashes of the player that was benched at the end of the season at Purdue. Orton has shown that he has a cannon for an arm that is even better than "Fragile" Rex. The problem is his throws are off the mark or his incompetent receivers drop them.

I postulate this to you. If Orton struggles against the Gay Steel Workers of America (which he will, the Steelers still have a decent defense) then put Grossman in for a few series and see what flies. I think that you will be pleasantly surprised to see a QB that can move the offense with his arm rather than wearing out the running crew.

In other well fuck me running news. Fuck me running the Cubs actually made a move this offseason to fill in an offensive gap and defensive gap, get this, in the same move! Jim Hendry took the time to put the fork down and actually talk to another team about a trade in the OFFSEASON? Is that a typo? No, Hendry actually didn't wait till halfway through a baseball season to make a trade. He did it in the offseason. The Cubs picked up center fielder Juan Pierre. Pierre is decent at what he does. His arm is suspect but he takes good routes to balls hit his way and he can get to them in a hurry. At the plate he is disciplined and doesn't swing at everything like certain players that played the position in the past for the Cubs (Patterson and Macias.) Pierre lacks any semblance of power but is an on base machine none-the-less. He has the speed to steal a lot of bases which in effect turns his many singles into potential doubles. This has another benefit that many are failing to see. If the Cubs actually do make it to the post season this year, Pierre's ability to steal bases well will come in very handy. Steals in the post season mean a lot because they screw with the pitcher’s head and put the runner into the all important scoring position. The most important thing about this whole deal is Korey Patterson won't be playing center at Wrigley any more.

Now that the hole in center is filled the Cubs should get right back out on the dancefloor to take a drunken and belligerent Milton Bradley back home. We need more crazy on the Cubs like I need AIDS but while Bradley is crazy he is also crazy good. Bradley is a fielding machine and his right field taylored arm will be very welcome in the limp wristed outfield of the soft throwing Matt Murton and Juan Pierre. Bradley, like Pierre, doesn't have typical outfielder power, but also like Pierre he is an onbase machine. Bradley had some problems staying on the field last year but I think that he will be healthy and ready for the 2006 season.

On another note. Ding Dong the Macias is dead. I will no longer have to scream at the T.V. every time Dusty puts Macias in the game because he is long gone. Now I can only scream at the T.V. if Dusty makes any other asinine move.